


Weekend of The Child

by SheWantsItAll



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn
Genre: Anxiety, Dysfunctional Family, F/M, Family Drama, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:01:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23235130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheWantsItAll/pseuds/SheWantsItAll
Summary: When Jason doesn't show up at Marvin's apartment on time for his weekend visit, drama unfolds. Marvin is distressed, Trina is annoyed, and Jason is (as usual) caught in the middle. Starting somewhere in the time gap between Falsettoland/About Time and The Baseball Game. So. Marvin is doing the whole growing up thing, but Whizzer hasn't shown up... yet.
Relationships: Trina/Mendel Weisenbachfeld, Whizzer Brown/Marvin
Comments: 8
Kudos: 41





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! This is my first fic for any fandom in.. 6ish years? Comments are appreciated!

Marvin was a nervous wreck. He knew that he had messed everything up. He knew that Trina would never forgive him. He knew that Whizzer would never forgive him. He was keenly aware that Jason would never forgive him. And he was filled with self loathing. 

He tapped his fingers anxiously on the sides of his legs. Jason was supposed to be coming today- usually, Fridays were his favorite days. How could they not be? Jason came over, they ate dinner, played chess, did Jason's homework... they were almost like a normal family. He loved Fridays, but today he was nervous for Jason's arrival. Trina was bringing him and they were going to talk about the bar mitzvah. He knew it wouldn't go well, things never did with him and Trina, but they both wanted it to be perfect for Jason. So they would try. 

He loved Fridays, but today was filled with a crushing sense of anxiety. He couldn't mess anything else up. Nothing had changed. No one hated him any more today than they had yesterday- so why did he feel like there was a cinder block on his chest? Memories flashed through his mind in rapid succession- Trina's face after her slapped her, Whizzer taunting him day after day, Jason's general embarrassment when Marvin did... anything- picked him up from school, took him to baseball... Jason could love him there in the apartment, but Marvin knew that his son was ashamed of him- of his choices, of his sexuality, of _him_ as a person, and that crushed him.

Suddenly, Marvin heard a horrible noise and realized it had come from him. He was crying. 'No. _No, no, no, no, no, no, no,'_ he thought. He didn't have time for this. Trina would be there with Jason any time to talk about the bar mitzvah, expecting him to have it together. He didn't have time for this, not now. Marvin pulled his knees up to his chest and sobbed. He couldn't help it. He felt so alone and so afraid, and he knew that neither of those things were likely to change any time soon. He had alienated the only two people who had ever really loved him. Trina wasn't going to forgive him. Whizzer wasn't going to love him. Jason was embarrassed of him. He was going to be sad and alone and so, so scared for the foreseeable future, if not forever. So, for the moment, he let those feelings override every common sense thought in his head: "Jason loves me sometimes" no. "Charlotte and Cordelia are good friend" no one likes me. Everyone hated him. He was alone. He would feel this way forever. Marvin sat in the center of his ugly sofa and cried alone for what felt like an eternity. Until he didn't have any tears left and his throat was sore. 

Marvin slowly uncurled himself from his ball and checked his phone. It was 7:30, long after Trina and Jason were supposed to be there. He had exactly one text message, from Trina, and he opened it quickly. 

**Jason is staying here tonight. We'll talk about the bar mitzvah another time**. 

Marvin's heart sank. No. She couldn't keep their son from him. He had rights with the legal system.. his son in the weekends. Just on the weekends. But the weekends were certainly better than never seeing him at all. 

He took a deep breath, steeled his nerves, and called her.


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized after I posted the last chapter that I worked myself into a weird corner with the time. It's not the 80s, because they have nonbrick cell phones (and I don't want to face act two in the 80s) but I don't want it to be a modern au either because I think we're more accepting now than Jason's classmates. So. We're going to say it's.. 2008. There are cell phones, but.. pre marriage equality in the US.

"Marvin, what do you want? I told you Jason wasn't coming tonight," Trina said. She sounded exasperated and she had only been talking to him for about six seconds. He hadn't even said anything yet. 

"Why?" He asked, surprised at the sturdiness in his own voice, given that a mere ten minutes ago he had been a shaky, sobbing wreck, "Trina, you know I only get to see him on the weekends. It's not fair." 

"It's just not happening tonight. He's staying here," Trina was hiding something. He could always tell when she was hiding things from him.

"That isn't a _reason_. Why are you keeping him from me?" Marvin took a deep breath. His heart was racing. He knew that if he didn't calm down he was going to snap at her. He didn't want to snap at her. He wanted to be better. 

Trina sighed. She wasn't one to keep things under wraps for no reason, she knew that the reasoning was going to hurt him. "Marvin.. he's embarrassed. The other kids have been picking on him.. over you and your friends," she hesitated for a moment, "One of the other boys hit him today and called him the most horrible names.. things I won't repeat. He came home so upset and after we talked about it we decided it would be best if he stayed here tonight."

His heart sank "Trina.. I.. I need to see him. I can talk to him about it. I can-"

She cut him off "He doesn't want to come. He told me he didn't want to come. I'm not going to make him," 

"Oh.." he murmured, his already broken heart shattered into a million pieces. 

Trina's voice softened. She knew that he was hurting, "Marvin, this isn't your fault."

How could she say that? It _was_ his fault. If he could just be normal, if he could just be straight, none of this would be happening. He thought about it often: how different their lives would be if he had just pushed his feelings away and stayed with Trina. They could he happy. Jason wouldn't be ashamed of him. Jason wouldn't be getting picked on. He wouldn't be attracted to her, of course, but he never really had been before. It didn't stop them from having Jason. It didn't stop them from being happily married for nearly nine years before his feelings for Whizzer got the best of him. 

"I.. I have to go," he said with a little sniffle, and quickly hung up, not wanting to hear anything else she had to say. It wasn't going to make him feel better. He didn't need his ex wife to lie to him. 

He found himself missing Whizzer. He didn't want to. He hated himself for wanting the other man, in any way, but he did. Whizzer had always known the right thing to say, he was much better with people than Marvin had ever been. Much smarter than Marvin ever gave him credit for being.

If Whizzer had been there when he was crying, he would have held him, maybe. He would have told him it would be okay, would have reassured him that his thoughts and feelings weren't reality. That he loved him. That Jason loved him, somewhere deep down. Trina didn't want him dead (anymore). The world wasn't against him. Maybe then he wouldn't feel do horrible. But Whizzer was not going to reassure him, except in the loneliest, neediest parts of his imagination. He lost his chance for that when he kicked the other man out. Probably before that. 

Marvin pushed the thoughts of Whizzer (and the self loathing that came with the thoughts of Whizzer) out of his mind and took out his phone to text Jason. The kid never answered his phone calls. Marvin couldn't blame him. 

He looked at the empty box, unsure of what to say. Finally he typed..

**Hey kiddo. I'm sorry about what happened to you today. You don't have to come over anymore if you don't want to, Trina called and told me. I love you and I'm here if you want to talk. I'm sorry.**

He sent the text before he lost his nerve and curled back up on the couch. It was going to be another long, lonely night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do y'all think? I have at least one more chapter planned out, but after that I'm not sure where we're headed.


	3. Chapter Three

Jason read the text over again and rolled his eyes. This whole thing was a mess. 

His mom had misinterpreted and now everything was wrong. He said he was tired of getting picked on, yeah, but he never said he didn't want to go to Dad's. He definitely never said he was ashamed. He just wanted that asshole David Applebaum to stop being such a homophobic prick. 

He _hated_ it when they picked on him. When they called him mean names that in their minds translated to gay. But he hated it even more when they said bad things about his dad. He hated it when they mentioned Whizzer. They never mentioned him by name, just as his dad's boyfriend. They said it with disgust, like his dad having a boyfriend was the worst thing conceivble. He missed Whizzer. 

He wanted to go to his dad's apartment. It was Friday. It was their time, and he was missing it. He had begged his mom to let him go and tried to explain, but she didn't listen. He had tried going behind her back and asking Mr. Mendel go take him and that hadn't worked either. He tried calling his dad to come pick him up, but he didn't answer. Jason knew something was wrong. Dad _always_ answered his phone calls. 

That's when Jason decided it was time to take matters into his own hands. He grabbed his "go to Dad's" backpack and started shoving in the things he needed: pajamas, clothes for the weekend, homework, phone charger, and the gray sweatshirt he had "borrowed" the week before. 

He checked the time: 11:30. No good. Mom and Mendel wouldn't be asleep yet, he would have to wait. He tried to call his dad again and still didn't get an answer. He was starting to get worried. What if his dad freaked out because he wasn't there? What if he believed what his mom had told him, that Jason didn't want to come? Jason tapped his fingers on the sides of his legs, a nervous habit he had picked up from the man himself. He took a deep breath. He had to keep his cool if he was going to get across town on his own. He laid down on his bed and put his iPod on shuffle. He just had to wait until Mom and Mendel were asleep, then he could go.

Nearly two grueling hours passed before he heard Mendel snoring. He grabbed the lanyard with his MetroCard and pepper spray, slung his backpack over his shoulder, and headed out of the house. On his way, he slapped a sticky note on the fridge

**I went to see Dad. You can be mad later. Love you**  
**Jason**

The subway ride was uneventful. It was crowded, despite it being nearly two in the morning. Crowded with teenagers going out and office workers going home after "late meetings." Jason yawned. His face hurt. The doors opened at his stop and he scurried out quickly, making his way back up to ground level. He tried to call his dad again. Still no answer. He went to his dad's apartment building, swiped his own entrance card, and scurried up the three flights of stairs to his door. 

Jason knocked and received no answer. He knocked again, a little more loudly. "Dad! Dad I know you're in there, let me in," he whisper yelled into the door. 

He heard a rustling, then a thud. And suddenly, his dad opened the door holding a baseball bat. His hair was wild and his eyes bleary. He hadn't answered the phone because he was asleep. Jason rolled his eyes and threw his arms around his shoulders. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! What did you think? I'm working on the last couple of chapters, so your input is appreciated!


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jason explains himself.

Jason hugged his dad tight. He always hugged him tightly. Jason loved him, despite what had happened to their family. He knew that Marvin was trying to be better, and he could truly see a difference in him. Marvin was quieter now; his reactions were never nearly as explosive as they once were, but on the flip side of this new composure, Jason could tell he was sad.

Marvin hid it well most of the time when he was there for the weekend, but Jason was perceptive. He knew. He also knew, from the brief look he caught at his dad's face, that he had been crying. Jason's heart clinched. This was his fault. He hadn't communicated well enough with Mom, and because of his poor communication skills Dad had been crying. He caused this.

"Love you," he mumbled into his wrinkled sweatshirt, hugging Marvin tighter.

Marvin smiled down at him "I love you too, kiddo...but it's three in the morning. What are you doing here? How did you get here?”

Jason pulled him towards the couch and plopped down, waiting for his dad to do the same. "I... I had to talk to you. Mom wouldn't let me leave and Mendel wouldn't either and you wouldn't answer your phone!" He said, carefully avoiding the fact that he had snuck out. He was desperate, and desperate times call for desperate measures. Marvin always answered the phone and when he didn't, Jason worried.

"Trina said you didn't want to come. I understand, Jason. I know that it's hard for you at school sometimes. I'm sorry that I caused it. I would change the way things are if I could. I get it if you want to stay away... it sucks. Because I always want you to be here with me, but... I get it" he sat back down on the couch, inches from where he had been earlier that night. Jason watched as Marvin ran his fingers through his own hair nervously.

Jason took a deep breath. He tried to remember exactly what he had said to his mom. He had been so upset at the time that it was hard to remember, but he wanted to avoid any more confusion.

He scooched in closer to Marvin, tucking himself under his dad's arm and pulling his feet up on the couch. He leaned his head against his dad's chest and listened to his heartbeat, finding it slightly faster than it should be. He wanted to be close for the sake of closeness, but he also couldn't stand to look at his dad's face, knowing it was his fault that it looked so dejected.

"I think you need the whole story before I prove that whole statement wrong. Mom had to come get me from school early" he started. He was careful to keep his voice even. "I don't know how much she told you... I got in a fight."

He felt Marvin pull him closer, “Jason, what have we told you about fighting?” He asked and Jason could feel a lecture coming. He hadn’t ever been in a fight before, but he had heard the lecture many times.

Wanting to avoid said lecture, he quickly adjusted course, "No no no! A verbal fight. Just words. Ya know. Until he punched me."

"Jason... Kiddo you can't be fighting. Is that what happened to your face?” It had somehow taken him this long to recognize that his son had a black eye. “Here... Let me get you some ice. That looks bad " his dad immediately flew into mother hen mode, carefully untangling himself and heading for the kitchen.

Jason smiled. His dad was never so protective when he and his mom were together. Dad went to work and Mom did almost all of the parenting on her own. He had a feeling that Dad was trying to make up for lost time. He was fine with that.

"It wasn't my fault!” he called out, so that Marvin could hear him from the kitchen “David was being a jerk and I couldn’t just let him talk that way! It’s not fair!” he found himself getting upset all over again. “They made me go to the principal's office. And they blamed the whole thing on me, even though David started it. I didn’t even get to hit him!”

He heard his dad groan. “He gets it from his father, kid. You're not going to change his mind. You can’t let it get to you.” He emerged from the kitchen carrying a bag of frozen peas, wrapped in a kitchen towel. “C’mere,” he sat back down on the couch and lifted his arm so that Jason could return to his original position.

Jason curled back into his side and Marvin held the make-shift ice pack to his eye carefully. “So. what happened after you went to the principal’s office?”

“The principal blamed me. He called mom to come get me. I didn’t get suspended or anything, since it’s the first time things have gone this far and I didn’t hit the guy. But it’s still my fault because _apparently_ , I instigated the situation. All I did was defend myself and my family and tell him to shut up. He says the worst things and I _hate_ him.” he huddled closer to Marvin, hiding his face in his shirt, partially searching for comfort and partially avoiding eye contact.

Marvin carded his fingers through his son’s messy hair, waiting for him to continue. He was taking it all in and, predictably, blaming himself.

“I just thought you should know what actually happened. Mom didn’t understand. I was mad and rambling and I probably didn’t make enough sense. I wanted to come here. I told her that I shouldn’t _have_ to be ashamed. That doesn't mean I am. I’m _not_ ashamed,” he emphasized. He risked a glance up at Marvin and saw that though his eyes were moist, he also had a tiny smile on his face. Jason smiled back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I'm sorry that it took so long to get this out. As you know, the world is wild. I also started an amazing new job that has been taking up a lot of my time. No promises on when the next chapter will be out, but I will say it shouldn't be another five month gap.
> 
> I hope you are all well! Let me know what you thought of this chapter in the comments! 💖💖


End file.
